OK. The pasta from last night is off of the wall. Marley took care of the majority of it, and there should be no lasting mark. I thank God for the friends who reached out to me last night after reading my post and who called to check on me today. Mary Ann and Dean...thank you for your prayers, your phone calls, and your undying, ever-increasing love for me. I cannot imagine my life without the two of you. Mary Ann - thanks for the blog post last night.
I'm listening to Rachel Lampa as I write. Her song, "I Am Blessed" ...Holy Smokes!!! "Lord, for all the worst and all the best, I am blessed." YO!
Raymond...thanks for calling me, praying for me, and being my brother. Rachel(Ritsema - not Lampa!)...thanks for the text message and for being able to find the beauty in nature...God's nature last night. I value your friendship. Jackson...u da man! Thanks for your prayers, and I am so proud of you.
Thanks to all who prayed me through all of that mess. I also heard from a few who thought I needed to "rely" and "trust" on Jesus more. Believe me, I rely and trust on My Father more than you can fathom. Sometimes, you just cannot "pray your way out of" something. God takes you through it for a reason. It's that whole "letting the storm rage and quieting the child" thing all over again. It's in the valley that I grow. I am well aware of this, but we do a huge disservice as followers of Christ when we strive to hide any authenticity whatsoever from this world God has called us to be His light to.
Life, sometimes, just bites. My testimomy is that I am still here. God will waste NONE of the pain. Let's be real.
So...I'm a little better today. I am very blessed, for sure.
My heart has been heavy lately with some other things going on, and I really cannot get into any of it here. I have so far to come myself, but I just feel that God is calling His people to GROW UP! So many people with so little investment with so many opinions. Let's be who God called us to be. Please.
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3 comments:
Yeah! I'm glad you're doing better! I was praying, praying, praying :o)
no problem bro.
Well written dear friend: As awful and as much I want to avoid pain and misery, I also have learned that I tend to hear God more..well, at least, pay more attention to what He has been trying to say to me for a long time in the midst of my pain. The coolest thing is when we can get to that place, the undeniably peace or "calm after the storm" that is so incredibly refreshing and yes, I do feel the renewing of my mind - As Paul talks about in Romans 12:1. Notice the "ing" part...it's a process. Since my pain typically does not come out of nowhere(my messing up and "life" has been happening now for almost 49 years)and therefore my relief and renewal process will also takes time - despite the fact that I would love that instantaneous fix. I love the feeling when I (on a really really good day!) can actually sense God transforming me. Thank You Lord, that I am still here! And thank You Lord, for Russ still being here - Faithful to YOU and always trusting YOU through the pain.
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